Hey people! So I uploaded another video to Youtube. This time it's the "TMI Tag" that's been going around. It was pretty fun to do. The filming quality's not so great because it's on my iPhone and the audio is really quiet, but check it out anyway!
I downloaded a new program to edit videos because iMovie wasn't really doing a lot for me. Now I'm using "VideoPad" and it seems great so far. Hopefully it stays that way!
Anyway, hopefully I'm having some progress with my hand controls. Hopefully I'll be getting them soon. I think I've decided not to work with voc rehab anymore. I'm getting a loan from someone who wants to remain anonymous, and even though I doubt anyone they/I know reads this, I'm not going to say who it is just in case.
More exciting news- we're leaving for Toronto in a week! I'm so pumped. My dad got off all of Tuesday we we're heading down earlier which I'm really excited about. Now we can hopefully stop in Niagara Falls and get to spend some more time in the city. I'm super pumped for the concert tooooooo. I've had to force myself not to watch too many clips of other nights on Youtube.
Speaking of Youtube, I enabled my videos to be monetized. Now I believe I just have to set up an AdSense account. I'm not exactly sure what it is or what it means which is why I haven't done it yet. Hopefully this'll make my videos get more views? Idk. I've gotten some good feedback so far which made me super happy.
That's all for now. Peace love and happiness baby!
<3 Poison
PS- I'm sending up major prayers for the lost Malaysian Airlines flight. I can't even imagine what those families are going through right now. It's all so sad. Hopefully they can find the plane soon and the little chance that they're on an island somewhere comes true. I'm hoping for the best. <3
Tuesday, March 18, 2014
Thursday, March 13, 2014
Advice to Social Service Workers
There's been something going through my mind for the past several months that I just have to get out on some type of social media. That topic is social services and its affect on the clients who use them. In my instance, I'm specifically talking bout voc rehab and advocacy. At times, it is really shameful for me to admit that I received my degree in social work. Before anyone has a heart attack, I don't mean that helping people is shameful. I went into this field because I wanted to help people. I still do. I've also been on the receiving end of social services for a while now. I get SSI and I got a lot of help with college tuition from OVR in PA. I even got driver training from them and they helped me get my license. I'm eternally grateful for these things. I truly am.
My frustration started with OVR in PA when I needed to get driving training. I remember asking my very first counselor if I could get driving lessons at college or during a summer break. They said no. It wasn't that big of a deal at the time because I was on campus and had friends with cars, so I could get around that way. As I moved through college, I started using the van service provided to students with disabilities, which OVR helped me with. Another thing I'm grateful for.
However, I needed to start a "pre-field" fall semester senior year. Now granted, I did start a little late, but it still took a ridiculous amount of time to get the services. I found out that if I moved my official address to school, I'd be able to get driver's training. I was ecstatic! I switched to the Erie office in maybe early August or late July. I met with my counselor that October. Then, due to miscommunication, nothing more happened until February-ish. Then by the time everything got approved, I actually started my lessons in mid-April. I did about 30 hours of training. My instructors were awesome. They completely worked with my hectic schedule and were awesome teachers. I love them. So I eventually ended up getting my license a week before graduation. It was a such a great feeling.
My original plan was to have my license by the time I started my internship in the spring, but that didn't happen. It was extremely stressful trying to figure out bus schedules and/or if I could get a ride from friends. That was just a fact of life, but it was still annoying. I can't tell you how many stories I have from those bus trips. The best one was on my very first day, but I'll get to that at a later post.
Since I didn't get my license until basically I was leaving the state, I couldn't get hand controls from PA. I honestly didn't think it was going to be such a bummer for this to happen. Once I moved up to NY, I found out that I had to completely start over with my OVR case. I had to re-apply to the NY agency/branch/office or whatever it's called. I started that process in June 2013. I did everything I needed to do, like have several meetings before I could actually meet with my counselor. I got doctors to fill out paperwork. I got my car inspected. I got another driving evaluation because the one I got done in PA wasn't valid in NY. All relatively understandable, just mildly annoying. You know, the typical government-run drawn out processes. Anyway, even with the paperwork from PA, I had to get this evaluation done, which basically came with the same exact results.
Then came the waiting came of getting it approved. I was told by the woman who did my evaluation that ACCES-VR (the NY department of voc rehab) had 2 or 3 weeks to send out bids to vendors for hand controls and the vendors had 2-3 weeks to send their bids back and then ACCES-VR would choose a vendor and I could get my hand controls. In total, it was supposed to take at most 5 weeks from when the paperwork was submitted. I believe I got notified when the paperwork was submitted, and it didn't take that long. Then the results got sent to the Syracuse office for approval, which I got. I even got a personal call from the man who was looking over my case to talk about some adjustments that I would need/be taken off. That's the last I've really heart about a solid movement towards me getting my hand controls, and that was mid-December. From what I had been told, that should've meant that I got my hand controls in about 6 or so weeks. I was ecstatic, because 6 weeks was on the longer side.
Several weeks went by and I didn't hear anything from my counselor. Then, after emailing and calling my counselor several times, he emailed me mid-January telling me that the contracts with the vendors had expired on the 31st, aka 2 weeks prior. I was furious because this meant that it was pretty much put on hold. I sent a very strongly worded email to him relaying this anger, and he had the audacity to reply in a rude manner. I was so pissed.
Now 2 months have passed since the email and I still haven't heard anything. I tried emailing him a few weeks ago and he literally told me he hadn't heard anything since his last inquiry on 1/17/14.
This is where my advice starts. Don't EVER tell a client that you haven't done anything with their case, that YOU messed upon, in over a month. Ever. I cannot express this enough. I thought this was common sense, but apparently not. I can't believe he had the nerve to tell me that he hadn't done anything in a month like it was nothing.
I got some advice from friends to go through the Center for Disability Rights, which I did. I got hooked up with an advocate in almost half the time they said it would take. Then I needed a form that she said she would mail me the next day. She said to be patient with the mail because it supposedly was being slow. Well, slow it was. I didn't get anything for over 2 weeks. This wasn't a big package either. It was 2 pieces of paper in a regular envelope. I've had bigger things get to me from huge companies, regular shipping, in shorter times. I called this woman once to ask what I should do since I hadn't gotten it in a week or so, and she said to call her if I hadn't gotten it by that Monday. That was a Thursday or Friday. When it didn't come, I called. Got no answer. I called 2 or 3 more times that week and 1 or 2 times the next week. I heard nothing. I finally got the letter about 2 and a half weeks after it was supposedly sent. I sent it over a week ago and still haven't heard anything.
I just can't believe that an advocate is being this impossible to get in touch with. I've called her cell and office. When I called the main number, they didn't even know who I was talking about at first. Like, WTF? This is an ADVOCACY center.
I've struggled very much for the past several months with this situation. I've got people all over baffled as to why it's taking this long.
The worst part about all of this is that it feels terrible to feel like you're not being taken seriously or that they don't give flying &*$% about you or your life. It's like I'm not even a human being. My counselor knows the area that I live in and how rural and out of the way it is. Not to mention that it's been during the winter months so I can't even push the 2 miles to get to the library. I should probably mention that I've tried to contact my assemblyman several times and his assistants have been very avoidant. I could understand if I was being abrasive or rude, but I believe in the philosophy "kill them with kindness" and that's exactly what I've been doing.
I'll admit I haven't doing too much in the past week or so, but I'm just so tired of dealing with all of this shit. I try to be positive and think that every call is another step, but I'm marching in place at this point. Excuse me, it's like I'm moving side to side with no actual movement forward.
So now I'm gonna stop my soapbox. If you've read through until this point, congratulations! =P Seriously though, if you take nothing from this post, please remember that the people you are working with are real people who NEED your help. Don't treat them like a name on a piece of paper and leave their case file in a pile on your desk. You never know what's going on with them and how the waiting and rejection is truly affecting their lives. In my case, I haven't been able to work, go to school, or do anything independently. I've got generalized anxiety disorder coupled with depression and sitting at home with nothing to do all day really is not helping at all, never mind the feeling of being ignored and that I'm not worth helping. I've got a degree. I lived on my own for 4 years. I've provided for myself ever since I went to college, and now I'm reverted back to a child-like dependence on my parents because I'm not seen as a real person and it SUCKS.
My frustration started with OVR in PA when I needed to get driving training. I remember asking my very first counselor if I could get driving lessons at college or during a summer break. They said no. It wasn't that big of a deal at the time because I was on campus and had friends with cars, so I could get around that way. As I moved through college, I started using the van service provided to students with disabilities, which OVR helped me with. Another thing I'm grateful for.
However, I needed to start a "pre-field" fall semester senior year. Now granted, I did start a little late, but it still took a ridiculous amount of time to get the services. I found out that if I moved my official address to school, I'd be able to get driver's training. I was ecstatic! I switched to the Erie office in maybe early August or late July. I met with my counselor that October. Then, due to miscommunication, nothing more happened until February-ish. Then by the time everything got approved, I actually started my lessons in mid-April. I did about 30 hours of training. My instructors were awesome. They completely worked with my hectic schedule and were awesome teachers. I love them. So I eventually ended up getting my license a week before graduation. It was a such a great feeling.
My original plan was to have my license by the time I started my internship in the spring, but that didn't happen. It was extremely stressful trying to figure out bus schedules and/or if I could get a ride from friends. That was just a fact of life, but it was still annoying. I can't tell you how many stories I have from those bus trips. The best one was on my very first day, but I'll get to that at a later post.
Since I didn't get my license until basically I was leaving the state, I couldn't get hand controls from PA. I honestly didn't think it was going to be such a bummer for this to happen. Once I moved up to NY, I found out that I had to completely start over with my OVR case. I had to re-apply to the NY agency/branch/office or whatever it's called. I started that process in June 2013. I did everything I needed to do, like have several meetings before I could actually meet with my counselor. I got doctors to fill out paperwork. I got my car inspected. I got another driving evaluation because the one I got done in PA wasn't valid in NY. All relatively understandable, just mildly annoying. You know, the typical government-run drawn out processes. Anyway, even with the paperwork from PA, I had to get this evaluation done, which basically came with the same exact results.
Then came the waiting came of getting it approved. I was told by the woman who did my evaluation that ACCES-VR (the NY department of voc rehab) had 2 or 3 weeks to send out bids to vendors for hand controls and the vendors had 2-3 weeks to send their bids back and then ACCES-VR would choose a vendor and I could get my hand controls. In total, it was supposed to take at most 5 weeks from when the paperwork was submitted. I believe I got notified when the paperwork was submitted, and it didn't take that long. Then the results got sent to the Syracuse office for approval, which I got. I even got a personal call from the man who was looking over my case to talk about some adjustments that I would need/be taken off. That's the last I've really heart about a solid movement towards me getting my hand controls, and that was mid-December. From what I had been told, that should've meant that I got my hand controls in about 6 or so weeks. I was ecstatic, because 6 weeks was on the longer side.
Several weeks went by and I didn't hear anything from my counselor. Then, after emailing and calling my counselor several times, he emailed me mid-January telling me that the contracts with the vendors had expired on the 31st, aka 2 weeks prior. I was furious because this meant that it was pretty much put on hold. I sent a very strongly worded email to him relaying this anger, and he had the audacity to reply in a rude manner. I was so pissed.
Now 2 months have passed since the email and I still haven't heard anything. I tried emailing him a few weeks ago and he literally told me he hadn't heard anything since his last inquiry on 1/17/14.
This is where my advice starts. Don't EVER tell a client that you haven't done anything with their case, that YOU messed upon, in over a month. Ever. I cannot express this enough. I thought this was common sense, but apparently not. I can't believe he had the nerve to tell me that he hadn't done anything in a month like it was nothing.
I got some advice from friends to go through the Center for Disability Rights, which I did. I got hooked up with an advocate in almost half the time they said it would take. Then I needed a form that she said she would mail me the next day. She said to be patient with the mail because it supposedly was being slow. Well, slow it was. I didn't get anything for over 2 weeks. This wasn't a big package either. It was 2 pieces of paper in a regular envelope. I've had bigger things get to me from huge companies, regular shipping, in shorter times. I called this woman once to ask what I should do since I hadn't gotten it in a week or so, and she said to call her if I hadn't gotten it by that Monday. That was a Thursday or Friday. When it didn't come, I called. Got no answer. I called 2 or 3 more times that week and 1 or 2 times the next week. I heard nothing. I finally got the letter about 2 and a half weeks after it was supposedly sent. I sent it over a week ago and still haven't heard anything.
I just can't believe that an advocate is being this impossible to get in touch with. I've called her cell and office. When I called the main number, they didn't even know who I was talking about at first. Like, WTF? This is an ADVOCACY center.
I've struggled very much for the past several months with this situation. I've got people all over baffled as to why it's taking this long.
The worst part about all of this is that it feels terrible to feel like you're not being taken seriously or that they don't give flying &*$% about you or your life. It's like I'm not even a human being. My counselor knows the area that I live in and how rural and out of the way it is. Not to mention that it's been during the winter months so I can't even push the 2 miles to get to the library. I should probably mention that I've tried to contact my assemblyman several times and his assistants have been very avoidant. I could understand if I was being abrasive or rude, but I believe in the philosophy "kill them with kindness" and that's exactly what I've been doing.
I'll admit I haven't doing too much in the past week or so, but I'm just so tired of dealing with all of this shit. I try to be positive and think that every call is another step, but I'm marching in place at this point. Excuse me, it's like I'm moving side to side with no actual movement forward.
So now I'm gonna stop my soapbox. If you've read through until this point, congratulations! =P Seriously though, if you take nothing from this post, please remember that the people you are working with are real people who NEED your help. Don't treat them like a name on a piece of paper and leave their case file in a pile on your desk. You never know what's going on with them and how the waiting and rejection is truly affecting their lives. In my case, I haven't been able to work, go to school, or do anything independently. I've got generalized anxiety disorder coupled with depression and sitting at home with nothing to do all day really is not helping at all, never mind the feeling of being ignored and that I'm not worth helping. I've got a degree. I lived on my own for 4 years. I've provided for myself ever since I went to college, and now I'm reverted back to a child-like dependence on my parents because I'm not seen as a real person and it SUCKS.
<3 Poison
Monday, March 3, 2014
Awkward...
That awkward moment when you realize you haven't blogged in you don't know how long… whoops!
Lots and lots of awesome things have happened since I last blogged:
Jeremy Abbott had a big fall in his ice skating routine in Sochi. And guess what? He got right back up and finished his routine like a total BOSS.
Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir performed the highest ever scoring routine in Olympic history. Then Meryl Davis and Charlie White got an even higher score, bringing the gold to America.
This article was posted on Buzzfeed: 10 Thing We Should All Know About The Paralympic Winter Games .
Jennifer Lawrence continued to be lovingly clumsy and fell at the Oscar's again. Thankfully (I think) for her, it wasn't on the way up to get an Academy Award. But the oh-so-wonderful Ellen Degeneres reminded everyone of these two slips on international television. Ms. JLaw's reaction is so awesome.
Speaking of the Oscars, let me be the billionth person to say just how awesome this year's show was.
My Top Oscar Moments 2014:
1. Ellen Degeneres hosting. That can stand alone. And attributes to probably half of the reasons I loved the show this year.
2. Jared Leto's acceptance speech. Can we just take a moment to appreciate the awesomeness that is that man? I mean, not many people can be so tactful while talking about AIDS and then make his award night about his mom. Please excuse me while I go swoon.
3. That selfie. If you haven't seen it, go google it. It literally broke Twitter.
4. Lupita Nyong'o. She is such a classy individual. I can't even. Go watch her speech at for Best Breakthrough Performance at the seventh annual Black Women in Hollywood Luncheon . It will make you rethink beauty.
5. Ellen (or somebody at the ceremony) ordered pizzas for the stars. Then an actual delivery man came to deliver the pizzas… From the Oscar's stage. Then celebrities (like JLaw, Brad Pitt, Kerry Washington, etc.) ate it. On paper plates. In designer clothes. Oh and Ellen collected money in Pharrell's hat. Awesome.
6. Pink performed "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" with Judy Garland's children in the audience.
7. Bette Midler sang a very toughing "Wind Beneath My Wings" in tribute to the entertainers who passed away this past year. Get ready with the tissues.
8. Lupita Nyong'o, Amy Adams, and Meryl Streep danced with Pharrell as he performed his nominated song "Happy". And those ladies can dance!
9. Ellen and Whoopi dressed up as The Wizard of Oz characters, Glinda and The Wicked Witch, respectively. Hi-larious.
10. Bill Murray added onto the list of people who passed with a man who he worked with on several films. So classy.
11. Emma Watson and Joseph Gordon-Levitt became my new Hollywood "shipped" couple. And take that as a compliment, Ms. Watson. I wouldn't share him with just anyone. ;)
12. And finally, my favorite moment: Steve McQueen's Reaction the winning best picture. He risked mooning the whole world to turn and celebrate the victory with the cast and crew. It was honestly the best way I can think of to end such an amazing Oscars.
And the award for the most awkward moment goes to: John Travolta. Idina Menzel can be tough to pronounce, but seriously, Adele Dazeem? I hope that was an intentional ploy to get her more attention. Otherwise, smdh. Also, if you haven't heard of her, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?! Go listen to Wicked. Or Frozen. Or Rent. Or Glee. The woman is amazing.
There were so many more wonderful moments that I can't list them all. I think I'll go watch it again. You should too! :)
Until next time,
Poison <3
Lots and lots of awesome things have happened since I last blogged:
Jeremy Abbott had a big fall in his ice skating routine in Sochi. And guess what? He got right back up and finished his routine like a total BOSS.
Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir performed the highest ever scoring routine in Olympic history. Then Meryl Davis and Charlie White got an even higher score, bringing the gold to America.
This article was posted on Buzzfeed: 10 Thing We Should All Know About The Paralympic Winter Games .
Jennifer Lawrence continued to be lovingly clumsy and fell at the Oscar's again. Thankfully (I think) for her, it wasn't on the way up to get an Academy Award. But the oh-so-wonderful Ellen Degeneres reminded everyone of these two slips on international television. Ms. JLaw's reaction is so awesome.
Speaking of the Oscars, let me be the billionth person to say just how awesome this year's show was.
My Top Oscar Moments 2014:
1. Ellen Degeneres hosting. That can stand alone. And attributes to probably half of the reasons I loved the show this year.
2. Jared Leto's acceptance speech. Can we just take a moment to appreciate the awesomeness that is that man? I mean, not many people can be so tactful while talking about AIDS and then make his award night about his mom. Please excuse me while I go swoon.
3. That selfie. If you haven't seen it, go google it. It literally broke Twitter.
4. Lupita Nyong'o. She is such a classy individual. I can't even. Go watch her speech at for Best Breakthrough Performance at the seventh annual Black Women in Hollywood Luncheon . It will make you rethink beauty.
5. Ellen (or somebody at the ceremony) ordered pizzas for the stars. Then an actual delivery man came to deliver the pizzas… From the Oscar's stage. Then celebrities (like JLaw, Brad Pitt, Kerry Washington, etc.) ate it. On paper plates. In designer clothes. Oh and Ellen collected money in Pharrell's hat. Awesome.
6. Pink performed "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" with Judy Garland's children in the audience.
7. Bette Midler sang a very toughing "Wind Beneath My Wings" in tribute to the entertainers who passed away this past year. Get ready with the tissues.
8. Lupita Nyong'o, Amy Adams, and Meryl Streep danced with Pharrell as he performed his nominated song "Happy". And those ladies can dance!
9. Ellen and Whoopi dressed up as The Wizard of Oz characters, Glinda and The Wicked Witch, respectively. Hi-larious.
10. Bill Murray added onto the list of people who passed with a man who he worked with on several films. So classy.
11. Emma Watson and Joseph Gordon-Levitt became my new Hollywood "shipped" couple. And take that as a compliment, Ms. Watson. I wouldn't share him with just anyone. ;)
12. And finally, my favorite moment: Steve McQueen's Reaction the winning best picture. He risked mooning the whole world to turn and celebrate the victory with the cast and crew. It was honestly the best way I can think of to end such an amazing Oscars.
And the award for the most awkward moment goes to: John Travolta. Idina Menzel can be tough to pronounce, but seriously, Adele Dazeem? I hope that was an intentional ploy to get her more attention. Otherwise, smdh. Also, if you haven't heard of her, WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?! Go listen to Wicked. Or Frozen. Or Rent. Or Glee. The woman is amazing.
There were so many more wonderful moments that I can't list them all. I think I'll go watch it again. You should too! :)
Until next time,
Poison <3
Friday, February 21, 2014
New Video!
Hello! I posted a new video on Youtube: First Impressions- Conair Spiral Curlers ! Check it out!
I used my iPhone 5 to film so the quality isn't the best but I did edit it. This was my first time filming/editing a video! It was pretty fun. I'm excited to make more.
<3 Poison
I used my iPhone 5 to film so the quality isn't the best but I did edit it. This was my first time filming/editing a video! It was pretty fun. I'm excited to make more.
<3 Poison
Tuesday, February 18, 2014
Oh! I Almost Forgot!
Hey! So I forgot I wanted to share this awesome Youtube show called My Gimpy Life. Season 2 just debuted the other day and I thought it was great. It's short and sweet but totally worth taking a look at. Here's the episode I watched- Day Jobs.
Check it out! It's from the perspective of a woman trying to make it as an actress while being in a wheelchair. Oh, and it's okay to laugh. It's funny. :P
<3 Poison
What's goin on people!?
Hey internet people!
I made part of a tag video for Youtube and uploaded it with the Youtube Capture app on my iPhone. But now when I go to look at it, it says there's only 53 seconds of video when it's really 16 minutes. Argh technology!
Anyway. So it's been a few days since I last blogged and I wanted to just check in and talk about what's been going on in my oh so wonderfully interesting life!
I've been having A LOT of trouble with voc. rehab ever since I moved up here and I'm in the process of working with a few different agencies/people to help me with my situation. However, I can't get ahold of my local assemblyman which is totally frustrating because the receptionist who I talk to when I call says she's going to look at his schedule and never does so yeah. That's frustrating. And now I'm hooked up with this advocate from the CAP program at the CDR in Rochester and they've been really good at getting back to me sooner than they said they would and giving me information that my voc rehab counselor just like neglected to give me. But I have to wait to get a waiver form in the mail so they can talk to my counselor and blah blah blah blah blah and it hasn't come yet so I'm like pacing my house waiting for this form to come (not really).
Oh and I emailed my counselor sometime last week asking for an update and he literally emailed me back today saying that as of 1/17/14 there's been no progress. As in, he hasn't made an inquiry in a month. Like, seriously? I don't know if any of you know what voc. rehab is, but it's a program that helps people with physical, cognitive, and emotional disabilities get employment and job training and basically anything that they need to be able to get and hold a job. In my case, the PA branch helped me with school/tuition and driving training and now I'm working on getting hand controls for my car in NY. I've been working with them since June (for the past 8 months) and recently hit a road block with the agency because their contracts with the vendors ran out and blah blah blah. Yeah. That's the last I heard from my counselor. Now onto the advocate. She told me that there has been some headway with the contracts and that basically there are all of these other services that I could be using right now that my counselor never told me about. He also basically misled me to think that I can only get help with one thing at a time which isn't true either, so they could be helping me with job searches and stuff like that while I wait for my hand controls. Needless to say, I was not happy at all with him when I found this out. Thank God for the advocate program because otherwise I'd seriously be screwed.
Anyway, the reasons I went into all of that is because I really felt like there was on progress being made and I was being ignored by voc rehab so I decided to think outside the box and reach out to other resources that may be able to help. Now, as you will probably learn, I seriously love Ellen DeGeneres. I watch her show every day and she is not only hilarious but she's such a kind person and always helps people with their problems. So I decided to write the show a letter on their site explaining my situation and asking for any kind of advice or help they may be able to give. I know people who write in usually write about other people and not themselves but I figured what the hay, I need to start advocating for myself more and getting comfortable with sharing my thoughts and story because I really want to be an advocate when I get my life straightened out. I literally almost just said when I grow up but I am grown up, seeing as I'm 23 and have a college degree. Ah scary freak out time. This is my scared spazzed out face.
I made part of a tag video for Youtube and uploaded it with the Youtube Capture app on my iPhone. But now when I go to look at it, it says there's only 53 seconds of video when it's really 16 minutes. Argh technology!
Anyway. So it's been a few days since I last blogged and I wanted to just check in and talk about what's been going on in my oh so wonderfully interesting life!
I've been having A LOT of trouble with voc. rehab ever since I moved up here and I'm in the process of working with a few different agencies/people to help me with my situation. However, I can't get ahold of my local assemblyman which is totally frustrating because the receptionist who I talk to when I call says she's going to look at his schedule and never does so yeah. That's frustrating. And now I'm hooked up with this advocate from the CAP program at the CDR in Rochester and they've been really good at getting back to me sooner than they said they would and giving me information that my voc rehab counselor just like neglected to give me. But I have to wait to get a waiver form in the mail so they can talk to my counselor and blah blah blah blah blah and it hasn't come yet so I'm like pacing my house waiting for this form to come (not really).
Oh and I emailed my counselor sometime last week asking for an update and he literally emailed me back today saying that as of 1/17/14 there's been no progress. As in, he hasn't made an inquiry in a month. Like, seriously? I don't know if any of you know what voc. rehab is, but it's a program that helps people with physical, cognitive, and emotional disabilities get employment and job training and basically anything that they need to be able to get and hold a job. In my case, the PA branch helped me with school/tuition and driving training and now I'm working on getting hand controls for my car in NY. I've been working with them since June (for the past 8 months) and recently hit a road block with the agency because their contracts with the vendors ran out and blah blah blah. Yeah. That's the last I heard from my counselor. Now onto the advocate. She told me that there has been some headway with the contracts and that basically there are all of these other services that I could be using right now that my counselor never told me about. He also basically misled me to think that I can only get help with one thing at a time which isn't true either, so they could be helping me with job searches and stuff like that while I wait for my hand controls. Needless to say, I was not happy at all with him when I found this out. Thank God for the advocate program because otherwise I'd seriously be screwed.
Anyway, the reasons I went into all of that is because I really felt like there was on progress being made and I was being ignored by voc rehab so I decided to think outside the box and reach out to other resources that may be able to help. Now, as you will probably learn, I seriously love Ellen DeGeneres. I watch her show every day and she is not only hilarious but she's such a kind person and always helps people with their problems. So I decided to write the show a letter on their site explaining my situation and asking for any kind of advice or help they may be able to give. I know people who write in usually write about other people and not themselves but I figured what the hay, I need to start advocating for myself more and getting comfortable with sharing my thoughts and story because I really want to be an advocate when I get my life straightened out. I literally almost just said when I grow up but I am grown up, seeing as I'm 23 and have a college degree. Ah scary freak out time. This is my scared spazzed out face.
Please excuse the weird lighting that is my hair part. I actually have hair on that part of my head and it's not a random bald spot.
Anywho, back to my story. I don't know if I'll hear anything, but even still, I'm glad I mustered up the courage to actually write to the show. Hopefully it works out!
That brings me to my next story of my life. Saturday morning (I sent the email Friday night) my dad woke me up saying he needed to talk to me, which like never happens. So of course my immediate thought was "OMG ELLEN CALLED!" bahahahahahaha. Completely absurd, right? Turns out it wasn't that, but my mom dad telling me that my mom was in the emergency room and had driven herself there at 8:00 that morning while my dad was at work and I was sleeping. SN- I would've driven her had I actually been able to. I'm not that heartless.
She said she woke up and was having weird chest pains so she drove herself to the ER. Everything ended up being fine though with her heart but they kept her for 6 hours because 2 of her blood tests levels were elevated. The one that has to do with her heart went down but the other one apparently indicates that she has pancreatitis. So now, after her follow-up appointment this morning, she has to go back to her doctor in a month to check it again I guess, which is pushing her foot surgery off even longer. It's just like one thing after another with this family. I don't even know. Is anyone else's family like this? Do any of you have like years where things just seem to keep happening? IDK. Let me know.
But yeah that whole situation just didn't really sink in at all I guess because it was just so weird. I think part of it was that I had a really bad anxiety attack on Wednesday because of my bank account and yeah and things were just breaking and I didn't know how I was going to pay to fix them and it was just stressful. I was totally spazzed out about it for the next like 2 days and after I had finally calmed down, a day later this stuff with my mom happened and I couldn't really spaz out. I don't know how to explain it other than I think all my energy went into those 2 days of feeling like hell that I was just numb for the next few days. I guess it's a good thing because I wasn't freaking out and putting myself through hell, but still, I feel kinda heartless that I wasn't more worried.
On a brighter note, only 35 days, 19 hours, and 24 minutes until the Demi Lovato concert!!! I'm so pumped I can't even tell you. I watched one video on Youtube of her singing Skyscraper in Vancouver but I don't want to watch anymore because I don't want to spoil it! But it looks BOMB from that one clip. Gah. I'm so excited. Yay. I'm starting to plan my outfits and hair and just yeah I'm super pumped.
I'll probably check back in tomorrow to say hi.
Peace out girl scout,
Poison <3
Friday, February 14, 2014
Happy Vday!
Happy Valentine's Day people!
I don't know about you, but I'm one of those people who enjoys Vday even if I don't have a significant other. Today's traditionally about romantic love, but there are all sorts of other kinds of love in the world, like friends and family. Today I spent some time with my Pop Pop who is currently in a rehab facility after breaking his hip about a month ago. I asked him to be my Valentine last week and his face literally lit up. It was so freaking adorable. So today when we went to visit him, I brought a valentine that I made for him. He is such an incredible man and it's hard seeing him so weak but I'm grateful that he's making good strides in his recovery. The other people in the rehab are also really adorable. I'm starting to make friends with some of the men who are always in the dining room when we go in there. As I was saying goodbye to my Pop Pop and kissed him on the cheek, like three men started asking where their kisses were. It was kinda weird but sweet at the same time. A woman challenged me to wheelchair races the next time I come in. She called me by my name which was weird until I realized I was wearing the sweatshirt that has my name on the back. =P
I hope everyone's Valentine's Day was great and you got to spend time with your loved ones!
Here's my Pop Pop! =]
I don't know about you, but I'm one of those people who enjoys Vday even if I don't have a significant other. Today's traditionally about romantic love, but there are all sorts of other kinds of love in the world, like friends and family. Today I spent some time with my Pop Pop who is currently in a rehab facility after breaking his hip about a month ago. I asked him to be my Valentine last week and his face literally lit up. It was so freaking adorable. So today when we went to visit him, I brought a valentine that I made for him. He is such an incredible man and it's hard seeing him so weak but I'm grateful that he's making good strides in his recovery. The other people in the rehab are also really adorable. I'm starting to make friends with some of the men who are always in the dining room when we go in there. As I was saying goodbye to my Pop Pop and kissed him on the cheek, like three men started asking where their kisses were. It was kinda weird but sweet at the same time. A woman challenged me to wheelchair races the next time I come in. She called me by my name which was weird until I realized I was wearing the sweatshirt that has my name on the back. =P
I hope everyone's Valentine's Day was great and you got to spend time with your loved ones!
Here's my Pop Pop! =]
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